Dead Pixels

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.


Dead Pixels is an interesting little game for Xbox Live or on the PC. It's a retro sidescroller with a pixel art style, which makes its name more than just a simple pun. More than just the art style is retro, however. It's a fairly classic side-scroller, much as you would often find back in the days of the old-school Nintendo Entertainment System, and much of the storyline fluff has a seriously groovy 70s vibe to it.

News

Well, I suppose it wouldn't kill me to give a state of the blog post. (For all zero of you regular readers.) I have been meaning to return to a once a week schedule, but money troubles have been getting int he way. It's a bit hard to worry about writing up a silly review on a personal, non-professional blog when you're having trouble making ends meet and pay the bills, despite having a full-time job + benefits. Freelancing has been slow. I have to find a way to promote myself better, and I am working on that. In the meantime, I'm debating whether or not I should try to resurrect the blog, or let it die. If I do resurrect it, should I keep it as it's been, or try and find a way to monetize it? I'd prefer not to do the latter, I hate ads, but I may have no choice. It's surprisingly hard to find a part-time job when you've got a full-time job and are looking for freelance work at the same time.
I've got a lot of thinking to do, but either way, expect to see changes around here soon. Hopefully for the better, but...

Dead Anyway

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

Dead Anyway: Stories From the Zombie Apocalypse is a collection of short zombie-themed stories in comic form. I believe the most apt word to apply to this book would be "potpourri." Fifteen artists contributed to this work, and each contribution is about as different from the rest as you can get.

Containment: The Zombie Puzzler

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

I never know what to do with self-explanitory titles. I mean, how do I explain it any further? "Containment: The Zombie Puzzler (on iPad and PC) is a puzzle game with zombies that you must contain." It's great for the developer/publisher, because they don't have to spend any extra time explaining the concept of the game. But reviewers like me who have delusions of cleverness no longer have anything to work with. Won't anyone think of the poor reviewers?

Zombie Bowl-O-Rama

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

Zombie Bowl-O-Rama... It's a casual game by Mumbo Jumbo about bowling. With zombies. That's not normally what you would consider two great tastes that taste great together. It's really quite... random. The "story" (such as it is) is that an asteroid FROM OUTER SPACE crashes into a graveyard and then suddenly zombies! The opening intro video and the main menu are actually probably my favorite parts of the game. They've got this great cheesy 50s sci-fi horror vibe that I quite dig.

The Walking Dead Episode 5.

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here. 

I'm just going to stay it right off the bat: The Walking Dead is my personal pick for game of the year, no contest. It is simply, in my opinion, easily one of the greatest adventure games ever made and one of the best games ever told by a video game. Episode five was the very satisfying conclusion to what has been one heck of an emotional trip into Robert Kirkman's world.
This will be my spoiler free-ish review. I may or may not write a spoiler-filled reflection on the game in a while, but for now, rest assured that if you haven't played the game yet, I will keep the spoilers to a minimum. Though I will say, right off the bat, that my severe acrophobia did not make playing this last episode any easier.

City of Horror

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

Regular readers will remember that the first game review I did for Buy Zombie was Mall of Horror. I recall having positive things to say about it. It was fun and strategic, though somewhat friendship-destroying. City of Horror is the... well, I'm not sure what to call it. It's its own game, so it's not an expansion or reprinting. Is it a sequel? Can board games even have sequels? The website boardgamegeek.com classifies it as a "reimplementation". I suppose that works better than anything I can think of.
Whatever it is, it takes the rules of Mall of Horror and then refines them, expands on them, and tweaks them in a few areas. This creates an experience that if you've played Mall of Horror will feel familiar, yet wholly distinct. If you've never played Mall of Horror, but you think you'd enjoy the kind of game where you feed your friends to zombies for fun and profit, then you're in for a special treat.

The Walking Dead: Episode 4

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

Episode four can be summed up in a single word: Tension.
I'll be honest, after the emotional beatdown that was episode 3, I was a little scared to play episode 4. If it messed with my emotions as viscerally as episode 3 then I would probably end up as a little puddle of goo on the floor that my wife wouldn't appreciate having to clean up. Fortunately, while episode continued the trend of a strong emotional impact, there wasn't as much in the way of sucker punches as episode 3 gave us. In essence, it's the perfect follow-up since it gives you just enough room to breath without letting up entirely.

All Things Zombie

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

All Things Zombie. Well, if any game ever gave itself a difficult name to live up to it's certainly this one. No reliance on another work's title like a licensed game, and no simple title that explains the basic concept of the game. No, ATZ wants it all. But can it live up to the standard it sets for itself?
Okay, maybe I'm being unfairly silly. It's a bad habit I need to break. Putting that aside for now: All Things Zombie, by Lock 'n Load publishing, is an award-winning board game that, obviously, takes place during the zombie apocalypse. It's also one of the most unique war games I've ever played.
Granted, I have to admit that I'm not the most avid wargamer out there by any stretch, but I have dabbled in it a little. While I can see the appeal of the genre, most of the time it's just not for me. I usually lack the patience for those kinds of a games. That just makes it all the more surprising at how pleasantly surprised I was by this game.

The Walking Dead: The Board Game

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

Now, if you're a regular reader, you may be confused that I am reviewing The Walking Dead: The Board Game. "Didn't he just review that game not too long ago?" you're asking yourself right now. Such confusion is normal, since what I reviewed before was not The Walking Dead: The Board Game, but rather, The Walking Dead Board Game. You see? The other one didn't have the extra ": the". Totally not confusing at all. All right, all sarcasm aside, because the names are so similar, for ease of understanding and the sake of brevity, from here on out I will refer to "The Walking Dead: The Board Game" as "this game" and to "The Walking Dead Board Game" as "the other game". I don't know if it will help you keep things strait, but it does help me.
Similarities in the name aside, the other game was based on the TV show, while this game is based on the comics, and while there are some superficial similarities between the games, (like their names) they are in fact very different.

Telltale's The Walking Dead: Episode 3

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

Like many natural-born citizens of the U.S.A. I have a more than a few hedonistic tendencies. I know it's not good for me, physically or spiritually, but there you have it. Despite this, Telltale games is making wonder if I don't have some sort of hidden emotional masochism streak in me. That's because episode three of their take on The Walking Dead is out, and it will will test all but the most callous of gamers. And the worst part is, I can't even tell you why without giving away spoilers.

Seriously, the only problem with a game like this one is that talking about it beyond the most general terms is treading on very spoiler-ish ground, and while it might not ruin the game for you if you do get spoiled, I'm the kind of guy who assumes that other people are like me and want to experience just what all the fuss is about. So, I will try and walk the fine line of giving necessary information without giving out spoilers. It'll be tough though.

Paranorman

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

Paranorman, made by the same people who made the excellent Coraline and the decent-but-not-great Corpse Bride, is a very interesting film, if for no other reason than it keeps shattering your expectations. Just when you think that you've figured the movie out, it takes a sharp turn and becomes something else entirely. In my experience, it's rare that you run across what is ostensibly a kid's movie that dares to be this smart without losing any of its accessibility.
Paranorman is the story of Norman, a young boy who loves scary horror movies and talks to dead people. He lives in a small New England town with the sole claim to fame that they once had a good old-fashioned Puritan witch-trial, with a real witch that cursed her accusers to come back as the living dead and everything. Pretty much everything in the town is devoted to advertising that fact. The town also has ghosts all over the place. Not fake ghosts advertising the witch, but real ghosts that Norman talks to. In fact, they seem to be the only people to accept Norman for his ability. Naturally, since no one else can see the ghosts, he gets shunned by... everyone. His mother seems to be the only person to even try to understand him, and even she comes off as a bit distant. Then one day, Norman's crazy uncle, who apparently can also see dead people, comes to Norman to tell him that he must carry on the family legacy and keep the spirit of the witch at rest so as to prevent to curse from being fulfilled. Naturally, things don't go quite so well as planned.

Telltale's The Walking Dead: Episode 2

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the published draft of the review here.

So, it took a month longer than expected, but Episode 2 of Telltale Games' The Walking Dead came out a couple weeks ago. Was the wait worth it? I'd like to make some sort of "in short" joke, but in all honesty, no single word or sentence, no matter how humorous, could do this episode justice. I mean, yes it's worth it, but what does that mean, really?

Let's start at the beginning. Episode two (subtitled "Starved for Help") takes place about three months after episode one. It's winter, it's cold, and food is running dangerously short. Right off the bat, you're introduced to a new character. Apparently, the group saved his life and he reciprocated by sharing his food. However, you better catch your breath right off the bat, since it isn't very long before you're presented with some tough choices again. And boy, are they tough. I hesitate to even mention what kind of decisions it forces you to make, event he early ones, because it feels too much like giving up spoilers. Well, not too far in, you meet up with a couple of brothers from a dairy farm. They say they have food that they're willing to trade for fuel so they can keep their electric fence running. But along the way you also find out about raiders nearby who don't hesitate to kill for what they want. Your soon going to start asking if the dairy farm is really as safe as it appears and what you need to do to keep yourself and the group alive, and whether or not you can keep the group together.

Zombie! Run for your lives!

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

You know the old saying that “If you and your friend are being chased by a dangerous animal then you don’t need to outrun the animal, you just need to outrun your friend? Well, Zombie! Run for Your Lives!, by Russian company Right Games, plays that adage to the hilt. You and up to six other players are all running away from a zombie horde, and only one of you is going to make it out with your brains intact.

Telltale Games' The Walking Dead

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

I have been a huge adventure games fan ever since I first played The Curse of Monkey Island waaaay back in the 90s. Yes, I understand that that's not that long ago for some people who have been playing since before graphics, but I was just a kid back in the 90s. Anyway, I loved the story-driven aspect of it all. The puzzles could be fun, too, but the story is what grabbed me. Games like the Monkey Island series because they were funny, games like Grim Fandango because they were funny and serious at the same time, and games like The Longest Journey because they were simply amazing. And yet, despite critics saying that adventure games have been dead for decades, companies like Telltale are still around, doing nothing but adventure games, and they aren't going anywhere, especially if they keep making games like The Walking Dead.

The Walking Dead Board Game

Please note that this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please check out the final draft of the review here.

Given how popular AMC’s The Walking Dead has become, it’s no surprise that it would branch out into various forms of merchandising. This of the series what you will, you can't deny that it's become hugely popular. A board game based on the property was inevitable, really. So it is that Cryptozoic Entertainment (most well-known for their Trading Card Game version of World of Warcraft) has brought us this game. But is it worth it? Let's find out.

Zombie; [sic] a madness

Note, this is the rough draft for a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please go ahead and read the final draft over there. It's a great website and source for zombie news.

This book is difficult for me to explain. You see, I tend to find faults even with books I like, and I have to hold myself back sometimes to make sure I'm not criticizing something that really doesn't need to be criticized. Part of it is my training as an editor and part of it is me being a critical person in general. It really helps me a lot if I'm getting paid to help someone improve their work. Not so much when I'm reading a book for the sake of it. Before I talk about this book, I need to explain a few things about writing and publishing.

Munchkin Zombies

Note: This is the rough draft of a review I wrote for BuyZombie.com. Please go ahead and see the final draft over there. It's a great website and resource for zombie news.


The Munchkin franchise by Steve Jackson Games is one of the most venerable in gaming today. It doesn't have the lengthy history of D&D or even Magic: the Gathering, but it wouldn't exist without them. The whole point of the game is that you are a munchkin... That is, you are a role-player who doesn't view RPGs as fun games and an exercise in improvisational acting, but rather as fun games where you kill monsters and take their stuff by maximizing your stats and dice rolls. There are quite a few versions of the game. The most well-known version is the original fantasy version, but there are versions for science fiction, kung-fu movies, the Cthulhu mythos, the Axe Cop webcomic, and more. However in all of those sets you play as the "heroes" killing monsters. Munchkin Zombies is a more recent set where instead of playing as a human survivor in the zombie apocalypse, you play as the zombies, hunting down humans so you can eat their brains.

Apologies once again.

Sorry. I doubt anyone is reading this blog anymore, but just in case... What started out as a short delay has turned into a death of anything, mostly due to real life rearing it's ugly head. I'm not sure when I'll get back on my weekly review schedule. I will be posting stuff up sporadically in the next little bit, but I'm just not sure how dedicated I can be to this blog for now. Which is a funny and kind of silly thing to say in the first place. Seeing as how I made this blog for myself as practice and nothing else... I dunno, it seems strange to apologize to anyone other than myself. Oh, well. We'll see what happens. Until something does though, well, you'll know that my circumstances remain stressful.

Pink Panther remake

I wasn't exactly sure what to expect from the movie when I first saw it, I mean, it's got quite the pedigree to live up to, ya know? But I also had to consider: Did I really want to see an exact clone of the original movie?

I was happy that Steve Martin played the part of Clouseau. I felt that if there was only one guy who could pull of this movie, it was him. I'm not sure if he did pull it off, though. Years later, and my jury is still out on that subject. I hasn't too happy about Beyonce, since she was obviously only added for sex appeal (and I personally don't find simply not wearing clothes to be all that "sexy," not to mention the fact that I don't think she's nearly as pretty as everyone seems to think she is. Oh well, to half-remember a quote from Ringworld: the minority is always insane.)
Anyway... moving on...